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In Jail
I know you know the cruel methods employed in lock-ups by the police to satyagrahis in order to find out their secret places or make them confess their crimes. They were forced to keep kneeling constantly, with their heads bent as near the ground as possible and were sometimes saddled with a load upon their bent backs. This is only a specimen of the torture they inflicted upon us satyagrahis. The police also tried to give me a taste of their ways of handling us. I had, however, already been constantly engaged in prayer, hymn singing, meditation, and other practices of sadhana. I had acquired the power of tratak (the concentrated gaze that charms or subdues the person on whom it is fixed). When the Head-Constable asked me to take the half-sitting pose, by God's grace, it struck me that I should do tratak on his face. I did so, with the result that I was sent safely from police custody to the Kheda District Subjail with no harm at all done to me.
A Hallowed Recollection
In the jail I came across a friend, Sri Dhanvant Shroff. It appeard that he was losing courage and might tender an apology to free himself from jail-life. I struck up friendship with him, by long loving talk the whole day, revived his drooping spirits. Though we had separated after release, that friendship later did me a good turn.
He had opened a big shop to sell rain-coats. I was at the time the Secretary of the Harijan-Sevak Sangh and had to go cycling to the Banks of Ahmedabad to withdraw money etc., even when it was raining in torrents. We had an account with Central Bank among others. On my way to the Bank, I saw Sri Dhanvantbhai standing near his stop. I accosted him and talked with him. Seeing my clothes completely drenched, he gave me a rain-coat as a present to save me from getting wet again. I have preserved that rain-coat as a sacred remembrance of his kindness and given it to my nephew Shantibhai for use. It is still with him, I suppose.
There were many occasions in my jail-life when, as usual, jail officers tried to strike terror in my heart. Jail-life offered quite often a test of our fearlessness. It provided God-gifted chances to evaluate ourselves properly.
Frequent Use Develops our Power
You remember very well that we happened to be kept together in Sabarmati Jail. There also, as you have personally seen, I used to remain silent and incessantly remember God. I could never have attained that power had I not kept up its unintermittent repetition through ever-ascending states of sadhana. It is very necessary to go on using our present power so that we can gain newer and greater power.
Just as one should put his knowledge to actual use for increasing and deepening it, so should one frequently use his power to automatically create not only greater power, but also nobler qualities in his heart. That shows we can gain something substantial in sadhana, only when we learn, by God's grace, to put in actual practice what we wish to do.
By God's grace there are many persons, still alive, who know what strenuous sadhana this jiva had undergone. I am not one of those who came down from the lonely Himalayan caves and talked of spiritual attainments that are nnot attested by witnesses. I am talking of things the veracity or other wise of which you can easily find out. I ask you to do what I have actually done in my life.
Keep Your Vows
Total and proper implementation of our resolves, our vows, increases our capacity to carry out more arduous resolves in practice. It also creates greater self-confidence in us. Against this if we fail to keep our vow in the right spirit, if we cannot act upon what we intend to do, usually we become even more weak-minded than before. That is why we must be very particular to see that our ideas are given the shape of actions.
We must summon up all our physical and mental energy as well as all our willpower and make it a pint, whatever the cost, to do everything possible, by God's grace, to bring about in actual fact what we think we should do. Then only can the irresistible power of unshakable deadly resolve rise up in our being. This is an indubitable psychological fact.